Post from 08/31/11:
I can't believe it! It almost seems like it's not real and I'll wake up tomorrow back in the old fat suit that I've lugged around more years than not in this life.
When I look back over these 100 pounds, I realize how losing each pound has shaped me in ways I could've never imagined today. With every pound of fat that I worked to eliminate came new insight into how my body works. Each pound I lost made me feel a little lighter and a little more free. Every time I saw a loss, I felt a gain in my self-esteem, self-worth and overall ability to tackle whatever may come my way.
This last Sunday was one of those landmark moments. I ran 1.5 miles on the Boone Fork Trail. No longer weighed down by a heavy, slow body, I felt like I was sailing with ease over the land, like a graceful.....hmmm, like some kind of graceful animal. lol I jumped over creeks and zigzagged over rocks, never stopping, hardly ever slowing. And when that old familiar burning started in my lungs and my body, I begrudgingly slowed to a fast walk. But how far I had come from the little fat girl who LITERALLY COULD NOT RUN!!! Past the woman who would try to run for 60 seconds without stopping but had trouble with those last 15 seconds. And now to this confident woman who, when she saw a large fallen tree in her path, sped up and lept across it and then disappeared quickly down the trail without ever looking back.
I have tears in my eyes as I write this. I don't need the praise from friends and family (don't NEED, but still LIKE), or the admiring looks from men (although they are nice too, I'm not gonna lie), all I need is this feeling right now, the feeling I've never had in my entire 32 years on this earth, pride in myself and comfort in my own skin.
And to think I'm not even done yet. I can't wait to see what's in store for me next in this exciting journey of self-discovery.
Hi, my name is Melissa and i just wanted to thank you for being an INSPIRATION!! being where you are now is where i want to be. I'm just getting started again. i started in october but fell off the wagaon in january. I guess i tried to hard at first and got overwhelmed with all the changes at once. Anyways thanks for telling your story and i read the answer to the question about the skin, which was one of my questions since i weigh over three hundred pounds its good to know i don't have to worry about surgery. Anyways please keep sharing and keep up the good work. :)
ReplyDeleteHey Melissa. I completely understand how overwhelming it can be! I tried for years (unsuccessfully) to completely change everything at once. What finally worked for me was just making small changes, one at a time. If you're not active, start taking a walk every day...and nothing else! Once its a habit, make another small change. As soon as you decide this is going to be a lifelong process instead of a crash diet that has you in a bikini by the end of summer, you will start to see everything completely different. And don't make a single change that you can't live with for the rest of your life. Good luck!
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